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Not one of Jake's Women

August 27, 2003 - 10:29 PM

    This week has been disappointing. I left work early on Thursday to audition for Jake's Women. I did pretty well. We had a second audition on Friday, where I felt I did even better. The director let us hang all weekend before posting the cast list on Monday. By looking at the first sentence of this paragraph, you may be able to reason out whose name was not on that list.

    Oh, that's right. Mine.

    Now, this is one of those moments where you must quickly decide how you're going to play it. The director was standing there, looking at me mournfully.

    "I'm so sorry," she said. "I just didn't have a part for you."

    "It's okay," I said, deciding to go for the sweet, understanding angle.

    She had cast her daughter in the role of the twelve year old kid. Her daughter's eleven, and it was either her or a twenty year old playing a little girl. Had she decided against putting her own kid in the play, I would have gotten a part. When Brian, my The Real Inspector Hound director, saw this, he immediately started teasing Joanne, the Jakes's Women director. I decided that this would be my moment to be classy.

    "She read really well," I said enthusiastically.

    "Well, it just looked so much better having an actual kid on the stage," Joanne said, obviously still struggling to justify the decision to herself.

    "Oh yes," I continued. "It really did make a big difference."

    "Casting the role of Jake was really difficult," she said. "I had different cast lists made up based on which actor was playing Jake."

    "Why'd you have to pick Jeff then?" I teased in a very lighthearted tone.

    But really. Why Jeff? If it had been someone else, I could have been in! Damn that Jeff and his acting ability. Anyway, I stood there for a while, making polite conversation as if nothing had happened at all. I then walked across campus to a pay phone and called my dad.

    "Call Mom," I said. "Tell her I didn't get in."

    "In what?" Jesus.

    "I didn't get into the play," I hissed into the phone, as if it was a secret.

    "That sucks!"

    "Well, it doesn't suck that much, actually," I said. "I was going to be very busy, and now I'll have more time..."

    "It still sucks."

    He was right. It did suck. It does suck.

    The only upside was the shock and outrage displayed by other people over my rejection. Cathleen, who I only sorta know through the theater, couldn't believe it. She told me that I was much better than some of the people who got in. It was so comforting. She got a role, and I congratulated her on it. She hardly seemed concerned with her own success though. Lovely, lovely girl that Cathleen. Apparently we had class together before: Theories of Personality and Development. I don't remember her at all, but she remembers me because of my shoes. She said she really liked them and thought of me as The Girl In the Cool Skechers. I thought that was adorable. We're in Irish Literature class together now, which should be fun. (Side note on Cathleen: She's in the fake sorority I joined.)

    Right after that, I met Elle in Environmental Science class. She hadn't seen the cast list yet, so I got to be the one to tell her that she got the lead. She wasn't all that thrilled. She had wanted a different part.

    "Which one is Maggie?"

    "The second wife," I said. Hadn't she read it?

    "And who's playing Jake?"

    "Jeff."

    "Oh Gawd."

    At least she showed a decent amount of sympathy for my terrible rejection.

    Anyway, school has started again. I'm getting used to the idea of homework again. (Crazy concept.) I'm going to go watch Will & Grace. I'll write more later.

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