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current mood: The current mood of lostintranslation at www.imood.com

Come on baby, light my fire.

June 20th, 2001 - 12:09 AM

    I watched Sex & The City for the very first time tonight. I needed to because Miranda mentioned Jon Stewart, so I was contractually obligated as a Jon fan to watch. Jon was also on Larry King Live. Excitement all around.

    I also bought a lighter tonight, even though I don't smoke. It's an attempt to be social. Observe:

    "Got a light?"

    "Yeah."

    "Thanks."

    See? Perfect. Plus I can use it during sappy songs at concerts. Maybe even really fast songs where a lighter makes no sense.

    I'm still obsessing about love. I do this every few months or so, often around holidays. Love. I'm lacking it. I don't have it, so therefore it is the one thing I want above all other things. The problem is that I don't want stupid teenage love that goes sour after two weeks and leaves me a bitter wreck. I don't want a serious relationship either. I just want someone who's funny and thinks I'm funny too. Someone cute who thinks I am also cute. I think I need to pay someone to compliment me or something. "Brigid, you are beautiful." "Brigid, you are so witty." "You gained ten pounds? I didn't notice." Nice things like that.

    I want kisses and hugs and dates. I want love. Of course, this is impossible. I don't know why it's so impossible for me, but it is. Mean girls, ugly girls, snotty girls, stupid girls... THEY can find boyfriends. So can pretty girls, smart girls, funny girls... just not me. I'm somewhere in average land. I'm not extraordinary enough to date. I suck.

    I am not drowning in a pool of self-pity here. Honestly. I'm just questioning the injustices of the Universe. What makes me so undateable?!? I'm not flirty. Maybe that's it. I can't think of anyone to go flirt with though. No way to test out the theory.

    Another theory is that I am genetically unsuitable for dating because I lack pheromones. I like this one because it isn't my fault:

    pher*o*mone (noun): a chemical substance that is produced by an animal and serves esp. as a stimulus to other individuals of the same species for one or more behavioral responses

    See? Not my fault at all. Damn lack of pheromones. I wonder if I could get a pheromone injection...

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