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current mood: The current mood of lostintranslation at www.imood.com

Two Jobs

September 14, 2003 - 11:22 PM

    I was really depressed at work today. Two months ago I felt really nervous about quitting my job at The Quick Stop to take a job at the law firm. Eventually I got over my nerves and quit. So why am I still working there? I suppose it's the draw of some cash on the side. Plus I get to say things like, "I'm working two jobs." Isn't that impressive? I should get a paper route or something and tell people, "I'm working three jobs to put myself through school."

    I saw two movies this weekend, and I didn't really enjoy either of them. Ophelia, Buffy, and I saw Once Upon A Time In Mexico on Friday night. All the action became monotonous and annoying after a while. The next night Buffy and I went to see Cabin Fever. It was one of the worst movies I have ever seen. Just... horrible really.

    I've been haunted by weird dreams. One particularly vivid dream was about there not being enough room in a van for me. Ani was driving. (I never liked her, haven't seen her in over a year, and for some reason I wanted into her van.) Khara and Kay were there too, as was Kay's little brother and his friend. A girl from high school that I pretty much never talked to was also there.

    "There's no room," she said ominously.

    I stepped back and the door slammed shut. As the van pulled away, Khara looked back at me. She mouthed, "Are you sure?"

    "THERE'S NO ROOM!" I screamed. I was pissed. It was one of those dreams where you really don't know you're asleep. Suddenly Ophelia was there, and she was driving me home. I woke up soon after that.

    I believe that dreams are important. They're based on little bits and pieces of conscious thoughts. Mine are, anwyway. I can usually trace the inspirations for the dream. I'm not sure what this one meant. Why Ani? Why that totally random girl from high school? I'm suspicious that maybe what my unconscious is really getting at is that Ophelia is a friend. There's still a part of me that dislikes her. She gets to me for some reason. Maybe the truth is that she would be there if I was deserted by everyone else. Maybe I'm too hard on her.

    That reminds me. I tried to be nicer to Ophelia and Buffy on Friday, but I don't know how well I succeeded. I wasn't mean, so that was a start. I wasn't exactly nice though. I was somewhere in between. Oh well.

    I need sleep.

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